The OTG Daily #40 Coming Home

 Although Thomas Wolfe's novel from the 1940s says "You Can't Go Home Again" perhaps because the protagonist Webber writes about his town in away that the locals find unflattering, I think in part you can if you are able. 

Art by Victoria Minozzi

I remember when I was a young adult, in my early twenties and living on my own, working in the city. When I went to Rhode Island to the home my parents retired to, I just collapsed into the couch. There could be all sorts of noise around me yet nothing could tear me from that snooze. Even when I had my own kids - and maybe especially because of that - I sought the comfort of resting into this soft holding space in a home where I had no responsibility to assert my adult self and could in fact collapse into dependence if just briefly.  

That was a delicious sort of sleep and today my oldest child was here (now in their mid 30s).  They too sought the comfort of the couch for a snooze. It was lovely to be able to afford that and to remember how restorative and important it is to feel that kind of unconditional support.

Yet there are many reasons we can't go home, as Thomas Wolfe's autobiographical character finds. His writing choices put him at odds with his origins. Who we become may not be what our our family or parents approve or support. Or those parents were never there to offer that kind of support in the first place.  Finding the haven of safety secure enough for restorative sleep may well be a rare privilege. It's quite true that there are many people at threat of losing their sense of safe haven right now - or have lost it over the recent years of war, famine, and global disaster.

I am grateful to come home to RI each week and for the rest of napping on a couch.

What are you grateful for today?